


Alison Urie

by patdbrendonn



Series: Urie [2]
Category: Panic! at the Disco
Genre: F/M, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 12:02:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14496561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/patdbrendonn/pseuds/patdbrendonn
Summary: A five-year-old should not be depressed. A child should live life, finding ways to have fun and get dirty. Not Miss Alison Urie, she watched her brothers almost every day, trying to figure out why she wasn't born like them.





	Alison Urie

**Author's Note:**

> Please read 'Baby Urie' beforehand, you'll get more of this story

## 5 years old

It all started at a very young age. Alison watched her sisters as they played around the backyard with the oldest brother, him being as mean as always to them. She sighed, reaching for her favourite toy car, a small 1970 Dixie Challenger, walking back inside to see her mom folding some laundry in the living room. She looked up at her daughter with a smile, placing the article of clothing that she held in her hand into a pile.

“Hey, Pooh Bear.” She said softly, grabbing something from the hamper of freshly washed clothes. Alison smiled at her nickname, placing the car on the table. It was like something in the air was off, like a heaviness that Alison couldn’t place. She wanted to say something but kept it inside. “You ready for school tomorrow?” Alison shrugged as she decided to sit on the carpeted floor. “What’s wrong?” Her mom asked her, soon getting up and lifting Alison off the ground and in her arms.

“Nothing. I just feel sad.” Her mom let out an awe, kissing her cheek. Alison sighed, wiggling out of her mom’s reach and running upstairs after she grabbed her car. She heard her mom sigh, stepping closer to the stairs.

“Supper is at six, Pooh!” Alison’s mom jumped at the sound of Alison’s bedroom door slamming. It still baffles her how a small little girl can make such an impact with a door. “You better eat tonight!”

 

“Boyd, I’m scared,” Alison heard from the hallway, right outside of her parents' bedroom. “Ally is been so sad lately. I’m afraid she’s sick or something…” She poked her head farther through the hallway, missing a few sentences here and there.

“Babe, you’re just overreacting. Alison is fine, she always will be, unless she dates a fucktard, then both of them are dead.” Grace let out a chuckle, sitting on the bed.

“But she is always playing with boy toys! Do you- do you think she’s a tomboy?” Boyd shrugged, taking his shoes off and placing them near the door.

“No idea, Grace. We might just have to get used to Alison not wanting to wear dresses or have long hair. She’s just different.” Alison felt the tears brim her eyes. _She’s just different._ She is normal to her, but is that what her family thinks of her? Is she different? Nobody dares to say that about Alison Kaylah Urie, even if it was true. She wasn’t stupid, autistic or didn’t look any different than everyone else. She was normal.

 

“Have a good day at school, Pooh Bear!” Grace yelled as Alison ran into school with her Pokemon backpack on. She found her way to the classroom that she was shown over a week ago and gasped. Alison has never seen this many kids in one place. Some of the kids had short hair, some had long. There was this one girl that wore a scarf type thing on her head, that Alison found very cute. She placed her bag into the cubby that said her name and ran over to the girl with the scarf on her head.

“Hi! My name is Alison, what’s yours?” The girl smiled, placing her hands into the indoor sandbox. The girl smiled some time, looking up to Alison every once in a while.

“Mine’s Takiyah. Want to be friends?” Alison nodded, sitting down with Takiyah in the sandbox.

“Okay, kiddies! Time to grab your crayons and sit at a table!” The teacher said as she clapped her hands. Both Alison and Takiyah got up and ran to their cubbies, both grabbing their crayons. Takiyah was the first to run to a empty table, Alison soon following close after. They sat down, giggling as they realized they had the same crayons.

 

“Mom! I have a friend!” Alison yelled as she ran to her mom, hugging her legs. “I missed you!”

“I missed you too, Pooh Bear! So, what is your new friends name?” Grace asked, grabbing Alison’s hand and starting to walk home.

“Her name is Takiyah! She doesn’t speak much but does understand me! She also wears a scarf on her head which I like!” Grace smiled down at her daughter, bending down to her height.

“You are very welcoming, baby. That scarf means she belongs to a different religion! Instead of being like us and Mormon, she has a different religion.” Alison nodded, starting to get confused.

“Why are there so many religions?” Grace sighed, placing her hand onto Alison’s cheek.

“Think of it this way. God is the moon, and all of the religions are the stars surrounding. A huge amount of them praise God, but just celebrate life differently.”

 

## 7 years old

Both Boyd and Grace sat in the psychiatrist's office, waiting for her to tell them what was going on with Alison. They held hands, not wanting her to be sick in the mind.

“Your daughter is Transgender…” The psychiatrist said softly as she folded her hands together. Grace looked weirdly at Boyd, him giving her the same look.

“What the hell does that mean?” Boyd said loudly, letting go of Grace’s hand.

“Your daughter is a boy trapped in a girls body. It happens when the fetus is developing in the womb, there’s nothing you can do to change the situation.”

“Then what do we do?” Grace asked.

“Change pronouns, so start calling Alison ‘he’ and ‘him’. Change his name, he might be better off with a name you two pick. And once he’s a little older, get him onto hormone blockers, to stop any changes that come with female puberty, then get him on Testosterone. This isn’t rare, they’re is a lot of people in Nevada that are Trans. It’s just something you have to respect. Once I started calling Alison he, he perked up and got really happy. Do you want him happy or sad for the rest of his life?”

 

“So,” Grace started as she sat Alison down. “I know wanting to be a boy is hard with a girl name, so I thought about a name for you. I think it will fit your personality, and better, fit what you feel inside. And, your dad likes the name.” Alison nodded, finding himself sitting on the edge of the seat, waiting for his new name. “Brendon. B-R-E-N-D-O-N.”

“I love that name! Brendon!” Brendon smiled, spelling out his new name in his head. “What about my middle name? Can it be Daddy’s name?” Brendon asked.

“Like, so you’re name would be Brendon Boyd? Sure, hun!” Brendon got up and hugged his mom, feeling her run her hand through his hair. “Do you want to get a haircut?”

“Yes, please…”

 

Brendon smiled as he watched his hair fall to the ground in the barbershop. He looked at his refection in the mirror, his refection finally fit his mind.

## 12 years old

Brendon hated school. Sixth grade is an awkward year for sure, most kids having to go through puberty, yet, Brendon has blockers to stop that. He feels like he doesn’t fit in anywhere, with the boys, or the girls. He’s usually all by himself, wondering why. Why was he lonely even when he looks like every boy out there. The short hair, skinny arms, awesome smile, it’s all there.

“Hey, Brendon!” Brendon turned around, expecting to see Takyiah, but he saw Takyiah without her hijab.

“Takie?” Brendon asked with a smile as he walked up to her.

“Spencer, actually. My therapist sent me to a Gender doctor and here I am, without my hijab and named Spencer.” Brendon smiled widely as he hugged his best friend.

“I am so happy for you!” Brendon cheered, hugging his new-found best friend. He watched Spencer sit down.

“You know, the reason my mother is so accepting is because of you. She saw how you are still a normal person, even though your body cannot say you’re a boy but your brain does.” Brendon smiled, thinking of Spencer’s mom. She was originally from Tunisia, learned English in less than a year because her first language is Arabic, moved to the US in the 1970’s to go to school, met Spencer’s dad, who happens to be Turkish, soon getting married and adopting Spencer from a family down south. Every summer, Spencer and his family go to Tunisia for the two months, spending time with family.

“Really?” Brendon asked Spencer as he pulled out his pencil case.

“Yeah! In Tunisia, it’s just odd to see somebody who is Trans. My parents have learnt that it’s okay to be like you!”

 

“Okay,” The teacher started, looking at all of the kids in the room. “My name is Mrs.Braun and I will be your teacher this year! I know, this must be scary for some of you, coming to a new school where you’re the bottom of the food chain, but, we’re going to do a little exercise to get to know each other! I’ll go first! So, I have two kids, Rebecca who is seven and Julien who is 9, I play volleyball and love to teach! Okay, who wants to go first?” She looked around when nobody raised their hand and sighed. She picked up a piece of paper and read out. “How about… Alison Urie?” Brendon let out a groan as he hit his head onto the desk.

“He goes by Brendon, miss.” Spencer said quietly. She quickly nodded, picking up a pen and crossing out Brendon’s old name, writing his new name in.

“I am so sorry, Brendon. Maybe at lunch we should go down to the office to get it all sorted. Do you want to go, Brendon?” He nodded, standing up and sighing.

“My name is Brendon, I like music, I like to play video games and go on the internet.” Mrs.Braun nodded with a smile, looking over at Spencer.

“And you, little man, what’s your name?” She asked Spencer.

“My name is Spencer, but it probably says something different on your paper. And I actually like all of the things that Brendon does, we’re best friends.” She nodded again, looking at the rest of the kids.

 

“Sir!” Mrs.Braun yelled at the Principal. “These kids are transgender, you have no right to keep these kids names as their birth names!” The principal scoffed, crossing his arms.

“Their names that they like are not their legal names, therefore, their names will remain the same, as Alison and Takyiah!”

“But they’re not Alison and Takyiah! They’re Brendon and Spencer!”

“Elise, end of conversation! We have more trans kids in the other classes, Ryanne who is in grade eight and Dallon who is in grade 10. We cannot legally call them by them by their preferred names. I’m sorry, but the board has rules and guidelines I have to follow.” She sighed, looking around his office.

“You cannot stop me from calling them by the name they associate with, sir. Spencer and Brendon are male, I don’t care what anybody else says, they’re boys. They wear boy clothes and have boy hair. If that doesn’t show you that they’re male, the school board has a problem with facing the fact that they are male, then I have a problem viewing them as female.” The principal sighed, looking through the phonebook on his desk.

“Maybe you should call the board… For being a huge activist, I believe, you should try to get things changed.”

 

Both Brendon and Spencer stood outside the boy’s bathroom, holding each other’s hand. This was a big moment for them, they were finally allowed in the bathroom of the gender they associate with.

“Go on! Go in!” Mrs.Braun giggled with excitement, clasping her hands together. Spencer and Brendon smiled, walking into the place where people always complained that was gross and smelly. To them, it was pure heaven. As they Brendon watched Spencer enter a stall, he stood near the sink, feeling like he was going to laugh and cry. Laugh because he is finally in a boy’s bathroom and cry because of the laughter. There were so many emotions. Brendon finally let out a long sigh before entering a stall, just sitting down and taking it all in. He is now accepted in his school, which feels fucking awesome.

 

## 14 Years Old

“Ow, fuck.” Brendon cursed as he felt the needle go into his leg. He let out a little sigh as he felt his mom touch his hair.

“Don’t swear, Bren. It’s just a bad habit.” She said quietly, almost like honey.

“Sorry.” He muttered as he sat up, rubbing the place that he just got the injection. “It just… It’s a huge needle!” Grace let out a little laugh as she grabbed Brendon’s jacket.

“Hey, you’re the one who needs Testosterone, so, suck it up!” The nurse rolled around the room on her stool, grabbing some paperwork.

“So,” She started, “You’re going to need to make sure you don’t fall asleep on the side that you got the injection on, which is your left, and don’t do any big exercises today and tomorrow morning. Don’t worry, you’ll get a hang of it! You have to do this every week!” Brendon let out a groan. “It gets easier. It’ll get to a point that you will have to do it yourself, but, that won’t be for a while.”

“Oh, okay. When do you think I will have to give it to myself?” Brendon asked the nurse.

“Maybe in the next six to twelve months. Depends if you’re mentally ready for it but for now I’ll just have to do it.” Brendon nodded, looking at his mom. “Are we… good to go?”

“Yep! See you guys next Monday!” Grace helped Brendon off of the bed, holding onto his back as they walked out.

“Mom, I can walk, I don’t need your help!”  Brendon avowed. Grace took her hand off of his back and placed it on his shoulder instead, pulling him closer.

“So,” Grace began, “Any cute girls in your class?” Brendon nodded no. “Boys?”

“Some kid named Ryan. I think he’s the other trans one, but I wouldn’t be able to tell. His name was Ryan but spelt feminine. He’s like, emo and stuff. I mean, I watched him bump into a girl in the hallway and he said ‘our skin just had sex’ and then playfully bit her. He seems messed but he’s just too cute for me to notice it.” Grace let out a hum.

“He’s probably just one of those people who when you don’t know them personally, he will seem weird. But, then again, you never know what his home like is like.” Brendon nodded, playing with his fingers. “Do you think he’s gay?” She asked Brendon causally.

“Yeah,” He breathed out, “I do. He usually stares at all of the guys, including me. I mean, I think it’s cool that he might be, he was straight while he was female and then gay, unlike Spencer, who was a lesbian at one point.”

“Yeah, that’s true. How is Spencer, I haven’t seen him in a while!” Grace exclaimed.

“He’s been taking care of his Grandpa, actually. I could see it hard for him, for one, Spencer has to bathe his Grandpa and help him do everything he can’t, and two, his Grandpa is very weird about the whole Trans thing. Sometimes he accidentally called him Takyiah but will catch himself. But then again, he’s in a different generation where there was not a lot of people who were even gay.” Brendon pondered.

“That’s true. God, I can’t imagine how hard that is to not always feel accepted.” Grace pondered for a while. “I mean, when your Dad and I was told to start calling you he and think of you as a male, it was easy. Do I want my own kid sad their whole life or happy? It took your Dad longer to take in the fact that you are our son, but he came around. He was scared, to be honest, he’s more fond of daughters than sons. I think it’s because he likes to protect them and now he feels like he can’t protect you, and I know that’s silly because you go to him for literally everything but still.”

“I’m just lucky. For us being mormon and stuff some parents would just ignore the fact that their kid is trans. But, being Mormon is the easier of the religions…”

 

Brendon closed his locker with his binder in hand, looking around for Spencer. He sighed, not seeing his best friend anywhere, yet, he saw Ryan. Ryan sat on the floor of the hallway, leaning on the wall next to the room of his homeroom class.

“What are you doing here so early, Ryan?” Brendon asked as he walked over, sitting next to the older. Ryan looked up from the paper in his hand, smiling when he saw Brendon.

“I wanted to come early, my dad came home drunk. But, There’s really good lighting here, so I can do my drawings easier.” Ryan closed his binder and looked at Brendon. “Why are you here?” Ryan asked as he placed his binder next to him.

“I live about an hour away, so my mom drops me off here, then goes to work. I always come here early.” Brendon placed his hands on his lap. “You’re trans, right?”

“Yup. My dad still doesn’t believe me, though. I get my period every month and have to bind my chest, it sucks. I have to wait until I’m eighteen to go onto hormones… Have you started T yet?”

“Yeah, one shot every week. And I hate needles, so I really don’t like it. But I need my man juice so it’s cool.” Brendon looked around. “There’s another person who is trans in the older grades… right?” Ryan nodded.

“Dallon, yeah. She’s cool. I like her name, Dallon. It was her birth name but it’s considered a female name so it stuck. And she’s one of the rare trans folks that don’t want to go through the surgeries and hormones, she likes herself how she is now.” Brendon let out a long sigh.

“I can’t imagine what that is like, liking yourself _before_ hormones. Gotta give it to her, if she’s comfortable walking around school with mini skirts and being six foot something she must be a super human or something.” Brendon said baffled.

“You should talk to her. What’s your sexuality? I mean, not to be rude…” Ryan hesitated.

“Don’t worry. I just like people, I don’t care if they’re male or female!” Brendon said. Ryan nodded.

“Then, you should ask Dallon out! I’m pretty sure she has a crush on you!” Brendon scoffed before laughing.

“Yeah, right! How the hell do you know?” Brendon asked with a smile.

“Because, she thinks she’s anonymous in our school group chat, yet, her username is like, Dally69 or something like that. All she does is talks about how cute you are, I don’t think she even knows you’re trans!” Brendon found himself blushing. “Do you like her?” Ryan asked, almost in a whisper.

“Yeah,” He breathed out. “I do.” Brendon looked over to see Ryan smiling. “What?”

“You guys are meant for each other! Here,” Ryan pulled out a slip from his binder. “Kenny, who is in the same grade Dallon is in, is having a party this weekend! You should come, be my plus one! Maybe you guys could even hook up!” Brendon scoffed.

“Sure, Dallon Weekes wants to fuck me.” Ryan shrugged.

“You never know, man! Just come, she’ll be there!”

 

Brendon walked into the house on the other side of Vegas, somewhere he really doesn’t know too well. He looked around, seeing some kids he recognized and some he didn’t know who the fuck they were. He stopped looking around when he heard Ryan scream his name, and yes, Ryan was already drunk.

“Dude!” Ryan half laughed. “So glad you’re here! Dallon is out back, you should go say hi!” Brendon nodded, getting pulled by Ryan. “Loosen up, drink some beer!”

“I’m fine, Ry. Hey, did Spencer get invited?” Ryan nodded no. “Why not?” Brendon asked.

“I dunno. But hey, you’re here!” Brendon sighed, walking away from Ryan and walking into the backyard. He stopped when he saw Dallon.

“Hey, Dallon.” He said softly, getting the attention of the girl. “Whaddya drinking?” He asked, trying desperately to make small talk.

“Vodka with cranberry juice. I didn’t think I would like it, but after a few, I could give a shit.” She responded, placing the solo cup between her lips as she took a sip. “Do you want to try it?” She asked, holding the cup out in front of Brendon.

“Sure, what the hell?” Brendon took the cup and drunk a little of the alcohol, soon finding himself an hour later drunk as all balls, laughing his ass of with Dallon next to him. “So, why don’t you want to fully transition?” Brendon asked.

“Well…” Dallon started as she put her cup down next to her, “I like me right now and don’t want to change… I like my body and trust me, I like my dick.” Brendon let out a soft groan as he shifted in his seat. “You liked that?” Dallon smirked.

“Fuck yeah,” Brendon admitted.  Dallon laughed, placing his hand on Brendon’s knee, which didn’t help. “I mean, I couldn’t relate, I don’t have one.”

“You don’t have a what?” Dallon asked, already forgetting the conversation they just had that made Brendon so turned on.

“A dick.” Dallon made an ‘O’ shape with his mouth before letting out a hum.

“So you’re trans, like me?” Brendon nodded with a slight smile. “That just makes me want to fuck you more.” She admitted. “Do you wanna…” Dallon trailed off, looking back at the house.

“Here?” Brendon asked with a slight hum to his voice. Dallon shrugged.

“Why not? Kenny knows me, he lets people hook up, hell, he’ll even give us a condom!” Brendon smiled, getting pulled up by the taller girl and getting dragged like he did before, only this time it was by a girl who was almost twice his height and probably could lift Brendon above her head. “KENNY?! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?” She yelled, soon finding Kenny in the kitchen. “I wanna fuck Brendon, got anywhere?” Kenny nodded as he sighed.

“My bedroom, I have a couch in there. Just lock the door, and there’s condoms in my nightstand, as well as lube. I mean, I don’t use it, so somebody might as well use it. Dallon nodded, grabbing Brendon’s hand and started to run to Kenny’s room. Once in there, Dallon shut the door and turned the handle to lock it.

“You a virgin?” Dallon asked as she turned around and smiled at Brendon.

“Kinda…” Dallon cocked an eyebrow. “I mean, I’ve slept with girls, but none of them had a dick. So in this way, yeah, but, ah fuck, you know what I mean.” Dallon nodded, walking closer to Brendon. “I find this really hot, you being a girl and so goddamn dominant. It’s fucking sexy.” Brendon practically moaned out.

“I’m sure it is.” Dallon replied.

 

## 16 Years Old

Brendon was heartbroken. Watching his now ex-girlfriend leave for college was tough, especially when they still love each other but only broke up because they couldn’t handle a long-distance relationship. It hurt, knowing that the girl he loves is now out of Nevada and in Colorado. He couldn’t cry though, there was no point. Does he want Dallon to succeed in live? Yes, he does. And if that includes Dallon going to college, so be it. Besides, he knows she wasn’t his soulmate. Just his ‘fill in’ to see what he likes in girls. And boy, he loves trans girls. He loves how he can be submissive and how he can be tied up and be used. He loves pain, really. Lip biting, smacking, even just very rough sex. He loves it all, and if the can add a girl on top of that, he’s happy. The last time Dallon and him had sex was kinda their goodbyes. Yes, they were sad, but it was the best sex Brendon has ever had and it lasted for more than an hour.

“Brendon, you guys broke up… there’s no point to mope around when it was mutual!” Spencer said as he comforted his best friend. “I don’t mean get back out there, but Dallon’s happy where she is! You want her happy, right?” Spencer asked.

“Y-Yeah… I just miss her…” Spencer sighed as he hugged Brendon. “I still love her…”

“She still loves you, too, Brendon! You know as well as I do that this was not going to last forever. One day you’ll wake up, and be okay. It’s okay to feel how you do.” Spencer was right, very right. Brendon woke up six weeks later and realized that he was okay. He felt normal, like the feelings for Dallon were suddenly, gone. It was then Ryan made a band, soon asking Brendon to join as the guitarist. That soon changed, Brendon being the lead singer. It also surprised Brendon when he found out that Spencer was the drummer, he really didn’t know much about the musical side of him.

 

It felt like a blur, Panic! At The Disco getting signed by Decaydance and starting to tour. By that time, Brendon had completely forgotten about Dallon. He was now happy, doing what he loved. He loved to entertain, what can he say? It felt like years went by in a flash.

 

## 21 Years Old

“Hey, Brendon!” Spencer called as Brendon tuned his guitar backstage. “I have somebody I want you to meet!” Brendon got up and followed Spencer to the alley, seeing a man. “Brendon, this is Sam, Sam this is Brendon!” Brendon awkwardly smiled, waving at the man in front of him.

“Hey!” Sam said bubbly, walking closer to Brendon. Brendon looked behind him to see Spencer gone. “Yeah, I think he’s trying to hook us up!” Sam laughed.

“Shit… I’m so sorry about him! He’s been trying to get me to date for years!” Brendon said.

“It’s fine… Before we get into talking a lot I’m trans, but I haven’t picked out a name yet!” Brendon found himself smiling.

“Yeah?” He asked, making Sam smile. “If you don’t mind me asking, what’s so bad about Sam?”

“I dunno, I’ve never really liked it in general. But I do want another name that starts with S.” She said.

“What about… Sarah? You can spell it anyway you want, but I mean, it would suit you!” Sam smiled. “Have you started transitioning?”

“Yeah, I just took my first dose of Estrogen yesterday!” Brendon let out a laugh.

“Wow, congrats! That’s fucking huge!” Sam tucked some of her black hair behind her ear. “Do you want me to call you Sam or…?” Brendon asked.

“Sam for now…” She sighed as she looked around. “My girlfriend doesn’t know about all of this.” Brendon mentally sighed, just wanting to date her. “Anyways… Can I get your number? Just to keep in touch?” Brendon nodded, putting his number into her phone. “Thanks, bye, Brendon!” He watched her walk off, wanting to run after her and kiss her. But, she’s in a relationship and won’t be that type of guy.

 

A whole eight months later, Spencer smiled as he talked to the new Sarah.

“I can’t believe you’re the same person! You look so feminine!” Spencer baffled, hugging her.

“Surgery does magic! And so does being single and ready to mingle! Where’s Brendon?” She asked, hinting at it. Spencer smiled, signaling for Sarah to follow him to the back.

“Brendon! I have someone for you!” Brendon turned around and saw her, making his heart stop.

“S-Sam?” He asked, walking closer.

“Sarah, actually! Nice to see you again!” Brendon let out a laugh as he hugged Sarah, taking in her scent.

“Same to you! God, you look… Wow!” He said, standing back and holding her hips. “How the hell do you look so good?” He asked.

“Eight months on Estrogen and some surgery! I’ve only had my hairline and cheeks done, that’s it! The rest was just luck, I guess!” Brendon stared in awe at the person who looked more masculine than him literally eight months ago. “I’m just lucky I was small before, so when my hips curved out and I got boobs I knew that my body was supposed to me female!” Sarah let out a laugh as she placed her hands above Brendon’s, who was still holding onto her.

“U-Uh, Spence, why not you leave us alone, just to catch up.” Spencer nodded with a smile, leaving Brendon and Spencer in chairs next to the stage. They talked for over an hour before Brendon had to go on stage, Sarah going onto the bus and waited for Brendon. She waited, like how Brendon waited for her for months. Once the show ended, Brendon practically ran back to the bus to find Sarah sitting at the table.

“Hey, how was the show?” She asked. Brendon let out a huff before sitting down across from her, grabbing her hands and holding them.

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you… I think, I think I’m in love with you…” Sarah found herself smiling, both blushing. “I want to date you and marry you and start a family with you! I want to grow old with you and have a bunch of dogs.”

“I- Brendon… You’re my dream guy… Both of us trans, it’s perfect!” Brendon nodded, both finding themselves slowly leaning in.

“Are we doing this?” He asked cautiously.

“I guess we are…” Once their lips connected, Brendon knew.

## 23 Years Old

“What are we doing here?” Sarah asked as Brendon guided her through a trail. He just smiled at her, not saying a word. “Baby, you’re scaring me…”

“It’s fine, darling. I just wanted to get away from the bus for a bit. We’re fine, it’s just the peak, you can, like, see the strip from up here!” Sarah nodded, realizing that she slept through driving into Vegas. “I used to come up here as a kid to get away from it all. It’s just so peaceful!” Brendon started to walk down another trail, Sarah following right behind.

“I feel like you’re going to kill me or something!” Sarah said, making Brendon laugh.

“I would never!” Sarah let out a sigh, grabbing Brendon’s hand. “I love you,” Brendon muttered softly.

“I love you more.” She responded. Brendon smiled, letting go of Sarah’s hand and spinning her around, making her look at the strip. Sarah gasped, her eyes going wide. “Brendon… This is beautiful!” She gazed upon the street where it’s brighter than most people’s future, seeing how beautiful it truly is.

“I know, right? To me it just looks the same as always, but I guess you’ve never seen it from this angle.” Brendon smiled as Sarah gasped again. “It’s perfect for this…”

“For what?” Sarah asked as she turned around, making Brendon panic. He stuck his finger out and pointed at something that wasn’t even there.

“Look!” Sarah turned back around, looking for the thing Brendon made up. She looked around for some time, soon looking back at Brendon. “Open your hand.” He demanded. Sarah nodded sightly, holding her hand flat in front of her. “You said you didn’t want a huge engagement story, me in a suit and tie on one knee. Well…” Brendon pulled a beautiful diamond ring out of his pocket and placed it into her hand. “I just want to fucking marry you!” Sarah stared at the ring in her hand.

“Bren… It’s huge! But beautiful!” Brendon smiled, nodding at Sarah. “Why do you want to marry me? Why me?”

“Because I love you! I love everything about you and I don’t think I will ever be able to love you any less. You just, make me happy! I dunno, I just want to spend my life with you!” Sarah wiped a tear from her cheek with a smile, taking the engagement ring and sliding it onto her finger. “Does it fit?”

“It does, perfectly!” Sarah wrapped her arms around Brendon’s neck, placing her lips on his, kissing for some time.

 

“Hey Mom!” Brendon said happily as he hugged Grace, Sarah right behind him.

“Hey, honey! How are you two?” Brendon smiled as he looked back at Sarah, her holding her hand up so the engagement ring caught the light. “Oh my god, you proposed?” Grace asked as she pushed Brendon aside to look at the ring, Brendon tripping over the hose in the front yard and falling down.

“Yeah, just push your son, it’s fine, child abuser.” Grace laughed as she took a closer look at the ring.

“Oh, please, Brendon!” She said as she still looked at the ring. Brendon grunted as he got up, brushing off the dirt from his ass and back. “I can’t believe you proposed! Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Grace asked.

“Because I proposed three days ago. And it wasn’t a real proposal, I just gave the ring to her.” Brendon replied.

“So, are you going to keep Orzechowski or change it to Urie?” She asked Sarah. Sarah thought about it for a few seconds before looking at Brendon, who doesn’t know what she is going to do.

“I think I’m going to change it. It’ll end all of the suffering of people trying to pronounce my last name!” Sarah watched Brendon’s face light up. “And besides, Urie is an awesome name!”

“Fuck yeah it is!” Brendon replied.

## 26 Years Old

 

“You may kiss your bride!” Brendon smiled, him placing his arms around her waist and Sarah placing hers on Brendon’s shoulders. They both heard everyone cheering, some people crying. Brendon felt Sarah smile against his lips almost to the point of making his heart warm. After their lips disconnected, Brendon turned around to see Spencer. He had to admit, Brendon is kinda nervous about Spencer’s best man speech. Because, if he knows Spencer like he thinks he does, it’s going to go two ways, Spencer crying or him roasting Brendon.

 

“Good afternoon, ladies, gents, boys, girls, and everything in between. For those who don’t know me, I’m Spencer, the best man. I would first like to thank on behalf of the bridesmaids and the others because I’m the best,” Brendon just burst out laughing, making Spencer smile. “I would like to thank Brendon and Sarah for including us in their special day. I would also like to thank all of you, the guests, for coming out, even after finding out it was not an open bar!” The guests laughed harder. “So, how did I get here, being Brendon’s best friend? As some of you may know, both of us were born female, us both being by each other’s sides during our transitions. We’ve been through the unthinkable together, both finding the way out. Then, Sarah came along and I could see how she shined upon Brendon. He will blush, smile and giggle all at the same time when talking about her. That’s when you know it’s true love.” Spencer looked over at Brendon and Sarah. “From the moment I saw Brendon and Sarah together, I knew we would all be here for their wedding. Even when we were writing our album Vices and Virtues, Brendon was so shy to ask if we could include ‘Sarah Smiles’ in the album, and for me, it was a no brainer. Brendon is in love and that song is how he won over the girl of his dreams, so, let’s all raise a glass because ‘this calls for a toast’,” Brendon pinched the bridge of his nose. “And please welcome Mr and Mrs Urie!”

## 31 Years Old

It felt like a dream. One minute he’s in labor and stuck in traffic while Spencer is trying to get through, not knowing that Sarah was the reason there was traffic. Sarah and Linda got into a car accident, Linda only had a broken leg while Sarah, didn’t make it. Brendon balled the whole way to the hospital, holding Spencer’s hand. Once they got there, Spencer helped Brendon into the building, practically falling through the door into the labor and delivery unit.

Everything else was a haze for Brendon. The pain got the best of him, making him zone in and out for a good hour. Grunts and whines left his mouth as his face was scrunched up in pain. His vision blurred and his ears rung. He felt like he was dying and he wouldn’t let that happen. He would not leave a baby in this world without parents. He even at one point hallucinated that Sarah was with him and that scared the living shit out of him. He doesn’t remember much after that, all he really remembered before everything went black was that there was blood everywhere. Was he bleeding out or just was plain old dying. He couldn’t even ask anyone because before he could, he was sucked out of his reality.

 

Brendon was in a coma for eight days, soon finding out that his baby was indeed healthy and well. Spencer had gotten temporary custody of the little one, still nameless. Brendon worried the whole time he was waiting for Spencer and Linda to walk into his room with a baby and once they did, Brendon felt free.

“Hi, Baby…” Brendon cooed at his little girl, who is now named Alison, like how Sarah wanted.

“She can’t talk, Bren,” Spencer said.

“Shut the fuck up.” He shot back. Brendon stared into the eyes of his daughter, still trying to realize if this is all real. “She’s so beautiful…”

“Your parents came down and your mom said she looks a lot like you when you were first born. Maybe it’s fate.” Brendon nodded, placing his thumb on the delicate skin on Alison’s cheek. “And before you ask, we got fuck all of sleep, she kept us up every night.” Brendon smiled.

“Awe… Did you keep Uncle Spencer and Aunt Linda up every night? You good little girl!” Spencer let out a scoff as Linda laughed.

“You won’t be saying that when she keeps you up every night!” Brendon blinked a few times, looking up at Spencer.

“She has been for the past six months! I think I’m used to it by now.” 


End file.
